What. A. BRO!

My roommate was joking with me about having sex in my bed while I wasn't home. I didn't have the heart to tell him that I have had sex on both couches in the living room while he wasn't home more times than I can count.

St. Louis, MO

Ass Man?

Thanks for walking behind me and only saying "heyy girrrrl, look at that ass" for 3 blocks. Of course I wasn't going to talk to you.

St. Louis, MO

Mardi Great

I love Mardi Gras. I can walk down the street saying "show me your titties!" and not have a care in the world.

St. Louis, MO

Cock Blocked

I heard you talking about the new intern. About how you can't wait to get yourself "up in her." I just told her to be careful around you because you sleep around and possibly have an STD. I know I made it up, but I still think it's funny. HAAA!

St. Louis, MO

Dog Days of Christmas

Thanks for sending me a picture of your dog's boner. What wonderful way to start my day.

St. Louis, MO

Cold Teacher

My accounting teacher has the biggest, saggy boobs ever. She was nipping the entire time, and I could not look away. It was like staring at a train wreck for an hour.

St. Louis, MO

Asian Pyro

I pretended to be interested in your stories about fencing club. I thought you were just a nerd until you told me you burnt down a science lab on purpose. What the fuck is wrong with you!

St. Louis, MO