Shopper Stare

I walked out of the dressing room and you were just staring at me. I couldn't find my friend so I walked back in until I thought you'd be gone. You weren't. Wtf?

Troy, MI

Old Man at Uncle Dan's

Stop caressing my shoulder. I just want a new coat and you smell like a car wash.

Chicago, IL

Racketeer

I wanted to play a joke and scare my friend coming out of the dressing room in the mall, but then I realized I was lurking in the rack of women's tank tops for about 5 minutes until she actually came out. Sorry, women's section at Nordstorm.

Troy, MI

Wanna-Be Jersey

While Christmas shopping at the mall a gelled haired man came up and said, "So many sexy ladies at the mall" and started fist pumping with his buddies. Although you want to live there, you're not on the Jersey Shore. You're in Chicago. Deal with it.

Chicago, IL

Daddy's Secret

There's nothing creepier than seeing a middle aged man with his three kids (one who is in a stroller) getting a Christmas "gift" aka sexy underwear at Victoria Secret for his wife. Will there soon be a fourth child?

Chicago, IL

My Secret's Out

I just walked out of Victoria's Secret after buying a Christmas gift, and these two guys just smiled at me and nodded their heads as I walked by. As I passed them, one of them said: "Oh, very good choice indeed" and started laughing with his friend.

Troy, MI

Old Man Outside of Victoria's Secret

You were just standing and staring at the mannequins wearing lingerie. I'm so glad you're not my grandpa.

Chicago, IL

Mother with Pigtails at Target

If you have a daughter that looks about 10, you are too old to wear pigtails. For your child's sake, dress more 'grown up', instead of looking like a schoolgirl with an accelerated aging disorder.


Amherst, NY

Target Parking Lot

I saw you looking in my back window. I was in the front seat on the phone.

Troy, MI

James from Macy's

You were a really cute salesman until you asked if I needed any help trying on my new bra in the dressing room. No thanks.

Chicago, IL